The Angel And Devil In Her

He's awakened the devil in her. For once, she thought of being mean to him. She thought of treating him like a clown. She thought of humiliating him in front of crowds. He doesn't respect her and she would do the same to him. The fire was burning in her. The fire of vengeance. The fire of wrath. The demon in her was already charging towards him with her fork but at the same time, there was this voice within which pulled her back.

Her expression softened. The pain and anger vanished. The angel in her is way stronger and has won the battle. She smiled and said to herself, "Let him be. Someday he'll grow up and realize what he's done. I'll give him chances to learn from his mistakes." She forgives him. Or perhaps, she just doesn't give a damn about him anymore.

True Or False?

I just realized that you're so packed with lies, false hopes and excuses just to prove that you're innocent. If going two ways were the best choice for you, then why did you leave me with false hopes? And after some time, there's this 360-degree change in you. Is it just for the sake of breaking a little, blind, foolish girl's tiny heart?

It really doesn't matter if you're going after this girl whom you used to bitch about. I don't give a shit. Really. But you need to learn how to stop bitching about people and show some respect. Otherwise, don't expect anything in return.

By the way, the little something that I gave you as a birthday present which you told me you very much appreciated it *Oh really?!*, I'll just take it as a bad investment. Don't you feel guity? Aren't you ashamed of yourself? I wish you would tell me that it is just misinformation or hearsay, hearsay...BUT, the question is "Can you prove reality wrong?".

Grieving Time Is Over

I don't need an answer. I don't need a reason. I appreciated you. I've done my part and this is the furthest I can go. You've built a wall around you, as thick as the Great Walls of China. Your icy cold stare almost killed me. It was venomous but I neither blame you nor hate you. I was the one who allowed my heart to get stabbed. The pain is too much to bare. I'm bleeding. I'm clueless but it doesn't matter anymore. If the best way to love you were to let you go, I would grant you your wish. No matter what, yours I'll never be. Let the hopes and dreams you gave me remain a mystery. Just remember, it was your choice.

The dagger sliced deeper. A million tears remain in me but I do not cry. I don't wanna cry in the deafening silence no more. I don't wanna weep for the memories every night. I miss you, deep within but I can't lie to myself anymore. I have pride. I have dignity. I've re-awakened the self-respect that I've once lost. I can't stay at the steep ledge any longer. I'll never forget you. I'll never regret having you by my side as you were once my happiness. No remorse but no more tears. No more promises.

Now, I'm picking up the scattered pieces from the ground and I'm trying to scrub the letters "T-R-O-Y" which were deeply engraved into my heart. I'd closed the door. I'd tossed the key as far as I could. This tiny heart needs a mending for the time being. Goodbye, my love. From the bottom of my heart, I wish you happiness.

Doreen Tan

All of a sudden, Ms. Doreen Tan and this quote just came across my mind.

"The heights by great men reached and kept,
were not obtained by sudden flight.
But they, while their companions slept,
were toiling upward in the night."
-- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Do you guys still remember the stuff she taught us? I remember the eye signals and how Nicole complaint about the way she collected our tuition fees. LOL =P

I Mish You

I still don't know the reason why you gave up on me and it's hard to accept your "No" and "Sorry". It hurts to let you go and it actually amazes me just how much you still mean to me. Before you left me, I had this CD burned for you but I guess I don't have the chance to pass it to you now and I'm dedicating this song to you. I guess it's one of your favorites and it sings my feelings out for me.

The V.I.P. In My Life

So, recently I had my <3 broken and I wanna thank a few people for being with me. I really appreciate those lovely text messages, the long talks, the time spent just to hear me whining, the comforting words and the tissue papers offered. I love you people!

My brother, Sebastian. Thanks for checking on me from time to time.

Though you denied, this picture still reminds me of someone. LMAO

My girlfriends for life.
From the left, Huey Juen, Hui Ying, Me and Joo Huei

Hui Ying - I'll see you in May. Missing you like shit!

I know you're only a screen away, hun! Come back in June!
Joo Huei - My all-time favorite counsellor. When's our next appointment?
Aun Joo - You're kinda depressed lately but still you spared time with me. Yay!
Jia Zheng - You gave me the courage to dial his number.

Nicholas - The clown. Sometimes you talk too much =X

Harvin - Single can mingle, double means trouble. True!Li Min - I looove driving your van around! Wheeeee!
Poh Yih - When's our next trip to Cyberjaya Old Town?Suresh - "Never let the fear of striking out get in your way" Do the happy-and-sour-face magic for me again!Leslie - You'll need to slap me hard but that won't stop me from believing =P

I'm sorry for the sour faces, for bugging you people, for spacing out and drifting into my own world. Hopefully things will get better soon enough. At least I know that there are shoulders to cry on and people I can turn to. It's enough for me. Love.

I Used To Love

I used to love sitting in between your legs,
watching the stars shine brightly in the sky.
The feeling of love was so strong and true,
in the destined presence of you and I.

I used to love putting my head on your lap,
feeling your warm fingers on my cheek.
It was the tender touch of your love,
a touch so gentle that made me weak.

I used to love popping my head out of the gate,
watching you leave and wave goodbye.
You wanted a little more time with me,
I could tell by the look in your captivating eyes.

I used to love observing your sunshiny smile,
while you were watching Russell Peters.
You lighten up my tiny, fragile heart,
and brought me much joy and laughter.

Though good things in life only lasted a while,
I truly believe that my dreams will come true.
Someday we will see a rainbow smiling through,
and find ourselves doing the things we used to.

~~<{@ *Dedicated to this very special someone in my life.*

They Say I'm Stupid

Why, yes I'm just too naive to keep believing. Maybe someday. Who knows? Miracles happen. My heart ached badly when you told me it was THE END but I was smiling =) because I believed and I'm still believing that there'll be a NEXT EPISODE of us.

I Still Believe

Somehow I know I will find a way to a brighter day in the sun
Somewhere I know that he waits for me
Someday soon he'll see I'm the one

I won't give up on this feeling
And nothing could keep me away

'Cause I still believe in destiny
That you and I were meant to be
I still wish on the stars as they fall from above
'Cause I still believe, believe in love

I know what's real cannot be denied
Although it may hide for awhile
With just one touch love can calm your fears
Turning all your tears into smiles

It's such a wondrous feeling
I know that my heart can't be wrong

'Cause I still believe in destiny
That you and I were meant to be
I still wish on the stars as they fall from above
'Cause I still believe, believe in love

Love can make miracles change everything
Lift you from the darkness and make your heart sing
Love is a river when you fall it's the greatest power of all

Oh, I still believe in destiny
That you and I were meant to be
I still wish on the stars as they fall from above
'Cause I still believe, believe in love
Yes I still believe, believe in love
I still believe in love
I still believe, believe in love

Scattered Pieces

Happiness requires effort,
whereas unhappiness is easy.
Unhappiness then leads to anger,
and anger makes happiness impossible.

You know I can't smile without you :(